The Sacrificial Victim

Victim.
I have come to truly hate that word.
Because a true victim does not have a choice.
And they never deserve what they receive.

Have you ever had to watch your child walk through a trial so completely and heart-wrenchingly devastating, that you found yourself pleading with God? Desperate. Like you would do anything, ANY. THING. to just take it away. To heal their brokenness. To rescue them. To restore them to what they once were; carefree, joyful, without a worry in the world.

For some of us, our children are dealing with constant torment from others. (Being bullied is no joke.  It truly brings out the worst in people.)  For other children it is a traumatic life event that haunts their days. Maybe it's a family separation for their safety. Maybe an array of varying types of (mental, sexual, physical, verbal) abuse.  Maybe divorce of their parents, or the death of someone they loved. Or maybe it is the devastating moral failure of someone they respect(ed).  Maybe it is a series of poor choices that come with heavy and irreversible consequences.

Although we are all walking our very own path; all while our kids are simultaneously walking theirs...I am guessing that we all ask the same question.

Why?  Why do I have to watch them suffer?  Why can't I fix this?  Why aren't YOU fixing this, God?  Why aren't You taking their pain away?  I AM PLEADING YOU!!!!

But what if we (moms, dads, caregivers) had a choice....

Would we choose...

1.) ...what was best not only for the molding of our child's character after that of Christ, but also for the future of their role in the ministry that He began...no matter what that looked like....

OR

2.) ...what was easiest?

Ugh...gut punch.  That is a decision that I never want to make.  And, honestly, there is a good reason that God does not give us (parents) the option.  It's because we can not be trusted to choose what He Himself chose for His own son.  He chose what was best and never what was easiest.  And God's best plan for Jesus, has effectively changed the eternity of millions of lost and hurting people.  

To God, It. Was. Worth. The. Sacrifice.

Sacrifice.
It is something that we parents have to do often for our kids without a second thought.  We understand the role we are to play in their lives...and we give (more than we have some days) to ensure that their needs are met.  We take our cues from Christ and we give until we are exhausted and empty knowing, expecting, hoping, pleading that our Father will always fill us again.

What happens though, when the victim collides with sacrifice?  

What happens when the very act that made a person a victim...is what God uses to extend His heart's reach?  

And what happens to us, deep within our spirit, when God asks our child to be the sacrificial one?  

When He is using them to teach us just how faithful and omnipotent He is?  (Omnipotent defined: having unlimited power; able to do anything)
When His plans for their lives are more than we are imagining?  

When He is molding them through the pain of trial because only He has seen their life from beginning to end.  Only He knows who He has designed them to be, and what it will take to lead them there.  

Would we have ever have chosen for our child to sacrificially walk the road they are on...if that meant that God would use it for their future mission field?  If it meant that some day they would meet someone who IS where they WERE...and through their raw, messy, gut-honest testimony of God's faithfulness and goodness...they would BE LIVING PROOF that there is ALWAYS HOPE, for a future free of debilitating fear and heavy burden.  ALWAYS TRUTH, to cover and remove the weight behind the whispers of the enemy.  ALWAYS GRACE, to bring freedom from captivity of guilt and shame.  ALWAYS LOVE, after the trail of poor choice.

The sacrificial victim.  I know how impossible it seems to overcome.  I know how much it aches to watch.  I feel the sudden and uninvited flood of emotions that follow those 'past days' thought-patterns.  I am easily angered by the thought of the scheme that they enemy used to try to destroy my child.  

BUT GOD...
God has something that He has been desperately trying to teach me...and I have been so close to getting it.
SO. CLOSE.


There I sat, telling my wise counsel, of my recent Romans 8:28 moment.  I went into the conversation super excited to share how God had used my circumstance to speak life into another's story.  Romans 8:28 moments are those in which I help someone see what they are missing amidst their misery.  Because of where I am and what I've walked through...I have a credible word of encouragement to speak.  I am speaking as one who still flounders some days...but also one who is having way more strong days than weak ones.  (That was not always the case.  At one point, all I had was Sunday.  Sunday was my point of greatest strength...and every day after, was only barely above the point of drowning.) As I always say, these moments bring purpose to pain.  

I was genuinely happy to share my story, but within moments my smile quickly faded as my joy was syphoned out by sudden, crippling guilt.  God was speaking to my heart and my tears indicated that I was not there yet.  My brain wanted to be, but my heart was too afraid to let go and allow God's best plan to penetrate my pain.

If you have a few moments...please listen to The Unexpected Letter.  I could barely see the screen through my tears the first 4 times I watched it.  My favorite lines...

"I was not a victim of human plans

and I was certainly never a slave to you.

I am the victor." -Jesus

YES!!!!!  I am the victor.  I want to know, live, AND feel that...all of my days.  I want to scream it into the face of the devil and watch him cower away.  I know the God that I serve and I know that it is through the sacrifice of Jesus that my children will be victorious over every obstacle in their life.

God wants to know...do I trust HIM enough to say AND believe....that it was worth my child's sacrifice?  That God knew their hearts intimately and because of that He knew what they were capable of overcoming.  He knew that we would be struck down but not destroyed because of our collective faith in Him.  He knew that we would help each other through the low times where we felt as though the end of the torment was far off.  

Can I know that my child's ministry in his/her future will bring forth healing to the victims who are where they once were?

I can.

I do.

If my child reaches into the lives of the broken and offers them living water that forever changes their course of eternity...it is worth it.  The price was paid by a Savior that taught us how to sacrifice with eternal purpose.  And that is a heart I would love to teach my sons and daughter to imitate.

Living in a World of Inappropriateness

One thing I say often....that I honestly never knew before having kids...is that they would teach me. Most times it is not something that I never knew...but rather something I forgot. Maybe a better way to say it, would be to say that they often remind me to have the same good morals I ask of them and to do all things with a more pure way of thinking. I didn't realize that my kids would constantly be asking hard questions; that would in turn keep me in line without them even realizing it. And I never knew that taking the time to see the view from where they are...would, more often than not, show me a perspective that radiated Christ.

One thing that my kids love to do is help me check out at the store. They fight...literally fight...over who gets to put the most things on the conveyor belt. Then they race to the other end and begin loading the cart back up with the bags full of groceries...in a quick...I don't care if your bread gets squished-I will do this before anyone else gets a chance to...type of manner. It keeps them occupied. It keeps their little unsatisfied eyes away from all of the candy, pop, toys, and beef jerky that the grocery store staff so cunningly place in the isle of our Wal-mart. So, I break up the squabbles as needed...and let them go.

A couple weeks ago I had my three youngest children with me. Ariel-8, Titus-6 and Levi-4; loaded up the groceries to be purchased as normal. But then they stayed at the back of the cart. I thought it was unusual...but since I was buying bread that had not yet been squished...I decided to let them be. They were behaving. They weren't handling all of the candy and toys and looking to me to buy it all. They were talking. Like normal little people. (I love it when they act, within view of the public eye, as though we normal!!!!) 

I looked back at them again and noticed something strange. My daughter had her arm oddly stretched across the end of the isle. After getting her attention, I asked what she was doing. She looked at her two little brothers and then back at me. She slightly lifted her hand from the magazine it rested on, while still watching her little brothers and shielding it from their view. She looked up at me, widened her eyes and mouthed one word. "Inappropriate!". I looked under her little hand and saw the massive amount of cleavage she was covering. I mouthed back two words. "Thank you!"

This world is full of inappropriateness. FULL! Commercials. Magazines. Ads on YouTube. Movies. Billboards. Christians. Ugh...it hurts me to type that last one. But alas...it is sadly true. The enemy will use anyone and anything to put seeds of inappropriate thoughts into a child's head. My children are constantly confused by how some people choose to speak/act/dress while claiming to be a Christ-follower. I want my kids to be sensitive to such things. To set their standards high no matter what is popular, accepted and easy.

I am the one who has to answer a lot of their hard questions. I am the one who is desperately trying to teach them to freely give grace WHILE still refusing to lower their own, self-set standards. I pray protection over their eyes, hearts and minds. I even go as far as to avoid 'repeat offenders' of inappropriate talk/dress/behavior when my kids are with me. They. are. mine. and more importantly...they were His before I ever knew them. I take my position, to equip them with a base of Godly morals and good character, very seriously. 

There is no guarantee that they will turn out well by chance. That is just not how life works. We are to live life purposeful and conscious. My children will have traits of Christ because I relentlessly prayed for them in the most secret places of my heart. They will know what it means to be a genuine Christian because my husband and I taught them the best we knew how. Because we led with our lives rather than our dictation. Because when we messed up, we asked for forgiveness...from our kids and from our Father.

My kids are setting their standards higher than I did as a child. I love to watch them choose what they are unwilling to allow into their life. Sometimes it is their own friend who makes them uncomfortable by the things they choose to do/say/watch. Sometimes it is an adult who dresses in a way that is scant. Sometimes it is an unwanted, non-Mom-approved advertisement that pops up while they are waiting for the newest TobyMac video to load. Sometimes it is a movie that has what they deem as evil. I give them room to choose. I respect their choice.

I'm raising up a generation in my house. A generation of leaders. Of servants. Of bold warriors. A generation that prays. That loves. That forgives. Because when I forget....they will remind me. <3

Barely Seeing

I am not alone much these days. I took on the HUGE MONUMENTAL TASK of homeschooling my three oldest children this year. I have ONE very independent (self-taught) 4th grader, ONE forever struggling to focus (tender hearted, easily distracted and always rushed) 2nd grader, and ONE intelligent (would rather be Ninja fighting his 4-year old brother) kindergardener that is not at all challenged with the work I find for him and yet surprisingly not confident in his abilities.

What a year it has been so far. Many tears. More laughs. Some Much frustration. And more proud mama moments than I ever saw coming. I LOVE seeing the heart of my children. And I love watching them grow together. I could deal without the fighting some days...but I would hate to miss the love that I get to witness.

My point in telling you that is to say...really...I. Am. NEVER. Alone. Even when I'm showering... questions arise. Questions that clearly can't wait for five minutes. *Moms...can I get an Amen?!* I have to laugh (although sometimes I'll admit that I choose to reply with a snotty and sarcastic tone)  when they come in and ask for help.

"Mom, can you help me get some orange juice?" says child.

"Seriously. SERIOUSLY?! Are. You. Seriously. asking me that right now???!!! Am I the only person that lives here that knows how to pour a drink?! Uh...I'm in the shower. How in the world would you suggest I get you orange juice?!" says frazzled annoyed surprisingly calm Mom. *wink wink*

For those of you that don't know much about me...I live in the snow belt of Pennsylvania. Yes...the snow belt. I willingly live where we get hammered with lake effect snow from Lake Erie. I, on purpose, live where the air gets so cold it not only simultaneously numbs and stings your skin, it freezes your nose hairs and actually hurts to breathe. The only time I am 'alone' as of lately....is when I take the trek, up my hill, in snow literally up to my knees some days...to do chores on our little country farm. No one bothers me there. They stay warm and cozy...and I go out in the bitter cold to throw hay, unfreeze water, fix broken halters, pet our goat, carry firewood etc....

And it is there, when I am finally alone, that God has been speaking to me lately. He's been giving me illustrations to write about. And by the time I make the frigid trip back down, still through snow up to my knees, and to my loud, cozy, question-filled house...they are forgotten. Sigh.... What is wrong with me? How could I be that excited about His inspiration...and then just forget it?! GAH!!

So the other night I had a long phone conversation with my dear, sweet friend, Sheli. I tell her that God has given me several illustrations to write about...and I have forgotten all but one. Her response...why don't you put a notebook and a pencil in your barn coat?

*insert light bulb here*
GENIUS!

So simple...and yet completely effective. And so that night after we hung up...I did just that. And a few moments later as I was cutting open bales of hay...God reminded me. 'Walking in dim light.'


A few weeks ago I was in my hay mow after the sun had set. I prefer NOT to do chores in the dark....but the ever busy, squeeze in one more thing before you go, struggling procrastinator in me sometimes wins out. Haha!

I turned on the lights downstairs...and climbed the wooden staircase to the mow. There is one lonely light way at the top of a high ceiling. It is not enough, considering what a HUGE space it is. And to make it even worse...right now there happens to be a half-full wagon of hay blocking most of the light that is cast down from that one. little. far-a-way. bulb.

Dim. I would definitely say the light is dim. So when I came from a barn floor full of lights and walked into the dimly lit mow...it made it all the harder to see. I was a bit taken back, wishing I had remembered to bring my flashlight, but unwilling to go back for it. I knew there were obstacles between me and the hay...and I was not sure how to keep myself from tripping over all of them. I squinted...it did not help. I waited (for a whole 3 seconds)...it did not improve. So I walked.

Gingerly I stepped. Guessing. Remembering what was there in the light. Small steps. Larger steps over whatever obstacle I thought I could see. And then...something happened. The shadows looked, less dark. My vision became more clear. The dim somehow, seemed brighter.

And that is when God spoke. "My child. You may be able to (barely) see in the dark...but you weren't meant to camp and find comfort there."

We are surrounded by darkness. Not necessarily always within...but forever surrounded. Darkness meant to harm us. And darkness seeking out those within our circle of influence. Some days it feels completely overwhelming. Sin that attacks from all angles, from all people, regardless of relationship. Those so broken, that you exhaust yourself to show them truth and prove it realness, only to find they won't accept it. It's as if they feel like it can't possibly be for them. The sadness that camps all around..some days seems to weigh me down.  But why?

Had I been choosing to struggle through the dark with only a poorly lit path...

Is that truly all that God had in mind for me...

                    Psalm 119:105-112 (NIV)

105 "Your word is a lamp for my feet,
    a light on my path.
106 I have taken an oath and confirmed it,
    that I will follow your righteous laws.
107 I have suffered much;
    preserve my life, Lord, according to your word.
108 Accept, Lord, the willing praise of my mouth,
    and teach me your laws.
109 Though I constantly take my life in my hands,
    I will not forget your law.
110 The wicked have set a snare for me,
    but I have not strayed from your precepts.
111 Your statutes are my heritage forever;
    they are the joy of my heart.
112 My heart is set on keeping your decrees
    to the very end."

...or have I simply not been consciously choosing to find light? It is there. Did you catch it? Black letters on the white pages of my Bible. "YOUR WORD is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path." If you find yourself barely able to see past your own circumstance. Or without answers for what the next step is. Start choosing light. Open up the Living Word of God...and gain strength in your faith.

God may choose to smack you with it when you least expect it...but more often He, the gentleman, will nudge instead. 

You pause in the middle of your morning rush when you see your dust-covered Bible. Nudge.

You hear a message on the radio that inquires about your quiet time. Nudge.

You hear a song that stops you in your tracks because it seems the lyrics were written specifically for you. Nudge.

Don't walk around stumbling and yelling at inanimate objects for 'being in your way'. Shed some light in your dark. Choose. Consciously choose...to search not only for a lamp for your feet(your next step), but also a light for your path(what is to come). 

"My child. You may be able to (barely) see in the dark...but you weren't meant to camp and find comfort there."-God

Sunday Expectations (Day TWENTY SIX-30 Day Challenge)

What a week you have had! A week full of disappointment and heartache that left you in a state of absolute exhaustion. You were so overwhelmed by circumstances in life that you barely even noticed that you hadn't taken much time to be still and meet with God. And you definitely didn't take the time to worship Him. You sent up no praises to reach to the Heart of Heaven...only requests and questions. 'God please help me. Take this burden from me. Why? Explain Yourself God. Why would you allow that? How could you?!'

After a week like that you walk into church empty. You have nothing to give. If you showed with your body language how your heart felt, you would have your head down and your hand out. You aren't looking to give of yourself. You are only looking for your own expectations to be met. The prayers that day seem boring. You can't get into worship because you can think of nothing to be happy about. And the message...that has to speak to you right? *sigh* What a waste of time. You leave more disappointed. You expected more!

What do you expect when you walk in to church on a Sunday morning? Do you expect to get something amazing? Do you expect your pastors to move you? Do you expect the worship team to bring you into the presence of God?

Maybe the more important question is what do you do when your silent expectations are not met? How many people hear about when you walk in and then back out of church on a Sunday morning without being inspired or moved? What is your first reaction? Is it to attack...or is it to uphold your leadership in prayer? Is it to look for reason to complain...or is it to look for a way to help? Is your church more effective because you are an active part of it...or you a wall flower that likes to put off a foul odor when your needs are not met?

" 'Everything is permissible'--but not everything is beneficial. 'Everything is permissible'--but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others." 1 Corinthians 10:23-24

Look again at the series of questions, just after the italicized section, at the top of this post. Do you see the common denominator? I'm sure you picked up on it already because of your advanced nature, but who is the obvious focus on your Sunday mornings? It appears to me that it is you. Don't you worry though. You are sooo not alone. I'm guilty of this mentality at times too. I've gone to a special speaker or Sunday morning service and left disappointed. And it was not because the preaching was bad...or because the worship was boring. It was my own personal heart issue. I chose to make the focus about me. And I can now CHOOSE to remedy that problem by making it only about God!

What about the days that I walk into church with expectations from God and only God? Well...at least He can handle me. Lol! He is the only One who can speak to me so intimately, that is leaves me speechless. Can you imagine...an author of many words...with out
a.
single.
word? Haha! 

When you walk in, expecting man to fulfill a God sized hole; man will fall short. Every.Time. Man can not compete. Mankind was not created to be your or my source of God or only link to God. They/we can not handle that responsibility. That weight is too heavy for any man or woman to carry.

What would happen instead if you walked in expecting to give to God? What would happen if you spent the service praying for your pastoral team? Like for real praying for God to use them in a mighty way, to touch someone else? What if you listen to the pastor's words and search for what God is saying to you?

There are a lot of Sundays I write down key points from the sermon. Some of them came from the mouth of my pastor. And some of them were specific things God spoke to my heart while the pastor was preaching. Then during the week, during my own personal devotional time, I expand on my notes. A lot of times I write 1,000 words or more on just one verse or one line that the pastor said. I'm always searching for what God is speaking to ME. If I waited only on the pastor or speaker or worship leader...I could leave disappointed. God. does. not. disappoint...(as long as my heart is right!)

As the wife of the Worship Pastor of my church...let me just tell you...ministry is the most fulfilling job we could do, right next to raising our own four children. But we will still fail you. We are far from perfect and we realize it. We have circumstances that most people will never know about. We often have opportunity for offenses. We have felt deep hurt and pain from people we trusted. And yet...we praise. We praise God for His blessings. We praise God for His faithfulness. We praise God for His protection. When we didn't see His blessings, His faithfulness or His protection...it is only because we weren't looking for it in the right places. It is always there!

Here is my challenge to you. If you are dissatisfied with your church...find out why. I'm not saying put your pastoral staff under a microscope. That is not constructive nor healthy. Instead, look inward. What can you do to change your heart toward who you are expecting to be filled by? How can you actively shift your focus from man to God?

"...whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God--even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good, but the good of many, so that they may be saved. Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ."

Maybe you should sit down and talk to your the Lead Pastor. Find out his heart in ministry. Don't assume you know it. And don't make it about your needs and your wants. Make it about his passion in ministry. And then...here is the cool part...pray for that passion! Watch how much more his messages speak to you when you know where his heart is. Watch how easily you enter into worship when you have taken the time to get to know why your leader is so passionate about it. It is not about you. It never was. Change your focus.

When I focus on my pastor's passion for the lost..I couldn't dare leave disappointed. He is speaking to the hearts of the lost. He is challenging the saved. He is touching the broken. He is preaching the heart of Christ in ways that young and old, saved and lost, mature and not so much...can connect to. It is not easy...but it is his called position. Rather than beat him up for what you don't understand...help him become more effective. Help to be the hands and feet of Christ. You are missing out on some amazing blessing by choosing to be a stanky wall flower. ;-) 

Pray this over your Pastor(s) this week.
"Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act towards outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." Colossians 4:2

Devote yourself to pray for those bold enough to speak the Gospel! And ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS be full of Grace!

Age Smage (Day TWENTY FIVE-30 Day Challenge)

Eric, my husband, got an opportunity to preach in our church this past Sunday. (He did amazing! Although when I tell him he kinda rolls his eyes and says that I 'have' to say that because I am his wife. Lol! For real though, I was so proud of him!!) Having been married to him since 2001...and dating him for quite a few years before that...I've heard all of his stories. Or so I thought. =) One of the stories he told that morning absolutely floored me! 

He recounted a story of when he was a little boy. Somewhere between the ages of 6-8, he had gone to a playground with his father. His dad was talking...and he was off playing with another little boy. The boy had a lot of questions about God. Eric was answering the ones he knew and the ones he didn't, he would run over to his dad, ask the question and run back with the answer. At the end of that conversation Eric prayed and this little boy accepted Jesus. Don't get me wrong, that IS highly impressive at his young age...but what floored me was what Eric said next. "I led this little boy to Christ, and yet I, myself, didn't accept Christ as my Savior until I was TEN!"

God does not make mistakes. He does not work by chance. He knew that Eric was willing. He knew that Eric was bold and unafraid. He equipped Eric (with the help of  his dad) even before Jesus was invited to live in his own heart. 

It is all about being equipped. To be equipped is to have the tools or qualities necessary for performance. When we think of evangelizing, is it scary? When we think of praying with someone to accept Christ, is it terrifying? If you are saying yes you are not alone. I was there at a time in my life. I actually went to a summer seminar to learn to evangelize. And when I got the opportunity to tell my testimony I cried. Not in fear. Not because of nerves. But because this man who literally had NOTHING...was so hungry for our hope. My tears for him were what made him accept Christ that day. God will equip you...I guarantee it takes a lot less than you think. =) You did not have to do the hard part. Our part pales in comparison to what Jesus had to do for that salvation. It's the least we can do!

So, yesterday, morning my oldest son was awake and standing next to my bed, super excited about the trip he was leaving on. How do I know how excited he was? First, it.was.5:13.a.m. Second, he woke up and immediately started doing homework. Haha! He saw the light on in my bedroom, knew that I was already awake and he remembered that he had a couple pages of school work to finish for the days that he was going to miss. Luckily, they weren't math! Whew...they were Bible pages. I can do Bible before six in the morning...math, ugh...not so much. Lol! 

I was going between writing my blog post, helping him understand what he's supposed to be doing and helping define words like 'equipped'. At one point on his paper there was a scale that ranged from 0-10. Above the scale was written, 'Color in the scale from left to right, stopping at the place that shows how equipped you feel to tell people about Jesus.' I was silent. I so badly wanted to peek, but I left him alone after defining the word equipped. I was minding my own business but I was SOOOO CURIOUS to see what he would pick.

Can you see how far he colored?!?! That is a SEVEN!!!!! I'd say he feels pretty confident in his ability to tell people about Jesus. May I remind you that my son is only eight years old!!! I was so impressed. It brought a huge smile to my face as I raised my hand to high five him. I only pray that his confidence only grows as he matures. I pray that he's just like his daddy in this area. Without fear!

I actually would say that Aiden is already on his way to being just like his dad in many ways. For example, when my husband was in school he was a great swimmer. His event was the 200-yard IM (Individual Medley). It was two lengths of the pool for each stroke; butterfly, backstroke, breaststroke and freestyle. Last year was Aiden's first year swimming and one of the swim meets was full of odd events that they didn't normally swim. Aiden, on that day, got to swim the 100-yard IM. It was so cool for me and my husband to get to see. I remember being there...as my husband's then girlfriend...and cheering him on in his own event during our high school days. To do the same for my son was almost surreal. (Incidentally, Aiden won his first competitive IM that day. All of his opponents were disqualified for one reason or another. Haha!)

Another similarity they have, is that Aiden also led someone to Christ at a young age just like his dad. I remember the day. My kids were playing in the dining room. Aiden and Ariel, both a few years younger than they are now, we having a conversation.

"Do you have Jesus in your heart?"-Aiden
"No, what does that mean?"-Ariel

I just stood in the kitchen. Silent. I wanted to see where this conversation would lead. I wanted him to have his own voice of faith. He can't live on mine. He can't live on his dad's. And he understood, that Ariel needed Jesus in her heart too. He explained with child-like faith. And then he asked 'The Question'.

"Do you want to accept Jesus into your heart?"-Aiden
"Yes! I don't want to go to hell!"-Ariel

And so they prayed. My son, led his sister to Christ because he KNEW he could. He has the same power that I do. He has access to the same power that Jesus had. Aiden has a powerful ministry ahead of him. He is a worshiper. He loves easily...and without condition. And he is not afraid. He has seen miracles. He has been a part of the prayers that helped those miracles become reality. I encourage you to live your faith out loud in front of your children...but be sure they have their own. Let them first pray for healing...so that their faith can become stronger. And be willing to learn from them. God has put children in your life for a reason...do not see yourself above. They are simple...and sometimes it cuts through a lot of crap that distorts something you've made complicated.

What about you? Do you ever discount yourself from 'having to witness' because of your age? You think you are too young. Or too old. Or maybe it is your social make-up. You say you are too shy or too abrasive. If, today, you met someone who didn't know Jesus as their Savior...what would you do? Would you feel unworthy to talk and pray with them to receive salvation? Or would you dive right in, knowing that while you might not have the answer to EVERY single question they come up with, the answer to eternal death and suffering is easy. Accept Jesus. Follow His ways. Learn His heart. Worship Him. Flee from sin. Share Him as often as you can!

On a scale of 0-10 where would you rate yourself on how confident you are to share your faith? How can you make an effort to bump that number up? You are equipped. You have Jesus. You have the Holy Spirit. You have the heart of God written in the Words of the Bible. You have family that will pray for your faith to become stronger. I don't care if it is your actual family...or your spiritual family. Ask them to commit to lift you up in prayer in this area specifically! IT is vital. It is valuable.

If ever there was a time when I feel like people should have hung onto Jesus' every word...it was right after He was resurrected. I mean seriously...not one of them should have doubted His true identity and power...but they did. What did Jesus tell them though?

"Then Jesus came to them and said, 'All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.' " Matthew 28:18-20

The above passage usually titled, 'The Great Commission', is for you. It isn't just for pastors. It isn't just for those with seasoned faith. It isn't just for the young, nor for the old. It isn't just for the disciples of Jesus. It is for every single soul that has accepted Jesus into their heart. That includes you my friend. If you are leaving the job for everyone else....anyone else but yourself...you are missing it. Jesus Himself, was the one speaking those words to us. If He were in front of you now...would it have a greater impact? Would you fight Him on it?

If you have breath...you need to speaking for Jesus. If you have a  heart beat...you need to be loving the lost (and the saved!) If you have sight...you need to be looking for opportunities to be used. If you can hear...listen for the voice of God. He is speaking. He is telling you where your ministry is. He is whispering thoughts of hope that someone needs to cling to. He is reminding you of Scripture so that you can share truth over lies. You are not dead...stop acting like you are. You have hope...share it at all costs. Wouldn't you want it for yourself? What if the person that helped  you to come to know Jesus had been too afraid? Or too old? Or too young? Or too shy? Or too busy? Or too.....

Eternity is a long time! Be a part of changing someone's eternity today! I guarantee you will be blessed...and they will be forever changed! That is a win, win! =)

Aggressive Praising (Day TWENTY ONE-30 Day Challenge)

Aggressive praise. I'd never heard it stated like that before. I would have never seen the importance of it, if not for a speaker I heard recently. I hung in her every word. She was clearly speaking only to me. Lol. Have you ever felt like that? I was in an arena (at the Women of Faith Conference) with I believe somewhere between 7,000 & 8,000 women...and if felt like Sheryl Brady was speaking just to me. She was feisty and passionate. And when she spoke I could relate to where she once was. At the age of 32...which, incidentally, happens to be my current age...God woke up a passion in her that had always been inside. She just didn't know it was there. Her example..."Adam had Eve within him...and he had no idea!" :-)

Let's look at someone who aggressively praised the name of Jesus while waiting for his miracle.

"Then they came to Jericho. As Jesus and His disciples, together with a large crowd, were leaving the city, a blind man, Bartimaeus (that is, the son of Timaeus), was sitting by the roadside begging. When he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to shout, 'Jesus Son of David, have mercy in me!' Many rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, 'Son of David, have mercy on me!'

Jesus stopped and said, 'Call him.'

So they called to the blind man, 'Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you.' Throwing his cloak aside, he jumped to his feet and came to Jesus. 

'What do you want Me to do for you?' Jesus asked him.

The blind man said, 'Rabbi, I want to see.'

'Go,' said Jesus, 'your faith has healed you.' Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road." Mark 10:46-52

Bartimaeus was calling out. I'm sure he was annoying. But you have to remembers that he couldn't see who was walking by. He relentlessly called out, not knowing when the footsteps that he heard shuffling by, would be those of Jesus. He was not willing to give up his healing because he was bothering someone along the way. He aggressively praised the Name above all names...Jesus! And what happened when people got annoyed? Opposition.

The people walking by rebuked him. They tried to shut him up. And what IF he had listened? How close was his breakthrough miracle from Jesus when the opposition got really bad? I remember this part of Sheryl's teaching very well. These words landed right on my heart and left me gratefully smiling. She said, "When opposition came, Bartimaeus knew that his miracle was closer than it had been all day."

How about the people who rebuked him for his annoyance? Do you picture them saying their words to him drenched with sarcasm? Haha...I sure do. They'd heard him calling out for a while now as they walked on their journey and now, at Jesus' request, they had to call out to him! 'Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you.' Bartimaeus could've cared less how they spoke to him. He wasn't praising them. He wasn't looking for their approval. He knew what was on the horizon...and he jumped at the invitation!

What is it today that you are asking God for? What are you believing for, in waiting? Are you close to giving up? Don't! Keep praising the name of Jesus. Your miracle is about to come near...and it will pass you by if you don't call out. You can stop Jesus in His tracks with your words of aggressive praise! :-)

Anyone out there facing opposition?!? If you are actively pursuing Christ and following the will of God...I can guarantee you are facing opposition from some angle. If you are right smack in the middle of ministry...you might have even laughed at that question...because it seems to come from ALL angles.

'Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you.'

What was your response? Did you jump up?! When Bartimaeus jumped up at the request of his Savior's voice...he was immediately given his miracle. I don't care how tired you are. Jump! I don't care how many times you've stood before. Jump up! I don't care how many people are trying to silence you. Keep praising...your miracle is close my friend!

If you ever showed up at my church on a Sunday...which, by the way, I would absolutely LOVE...you would see me on the worship team. If you were to watch me...which I don't recommend or desire, lol...you'd see a difference in my worship. Not as in 'different than anyone else'...but that I change according to whether God is speaking to me...or I am praising Him. There are times when I reverently worship and just tell God how much I adore Him. How thankful I am for Him. And how amazing He is to me. Then there are times that I aggressively praise. I might be calling forth things in my life that need to line up with God's Word. Sometimes I might be asking God's warrior angels to war over a stronghold that has been revealed in someone I love. Sometimes it is healing I command in the name of Jesus. And if you ever saw me put my mic down to my side...it might be you I am warring for. I don't care where I am, or who is watching; when God asks me to aggressively praise...I become feisty. That is my new favorite descriptive word! 

Are you willing to get a little feisty with me? Are you willing to aggressively praise your God when asked?! Are you willing to go through the flames of opposition to come out of the fire a more refined version of you? I ABSOLUTELY AM! I do not live in fear. Those days are behind me. I know my God fights for me. And I know everything He touches or speaks, has Victory!

"He ransoms me unharmed from the battle waged against me, even though many oppose me. God, who is enthroned forever, will hear them and afflict them-men who never change their ways and have no fear of God." Psalm 55:18-19

I will leave you with one final thought from Sheryl. "Stay in pursuit of Him. Stay through the people. Through the church. Through the opposition. Keep praising because the enemy knows as soon as you open your mouth you will have all you need."

Trading Up (Day EIGHTEEN-30 Day Challenge)

Someone out there, somewhere, must need these words today. Do you want to know how I know? It has been my hardest morning so far. My head is pounding, my body is exhausted and it is a fight. There is someone today, though, someone who has been needing this reminder. So I will press on toward my goal. I will not be defeated. If it is you...I'd love to know the name(s) of the one(s) I fought for. It gives purpose to pain. :-)

Today we are going to talk about trading. It is all about the deal. You want this, and I could use that...so lets trade. What did you then and what do you now like to trade? If you were anything like my generation, during your childhood years you probably exchanged baseball cards, video games, Barbie clothes or movies. When I was a teen girl...it was make-up, notes folded like a tiny football and clothes. Now as adults we probably most exchange acts of labor. 'I'll help you cut, load and stack firewood and you can help me put in hay.' Or...'I'll watch your kids so you can go shopping alone (cue angelic choir),,,if you'll just bring me back some milk.' We probably trade labor more than we realize.

For some, the trade scale is tipped heavily to one side. One friend always expects and the other friend never asks. If they aren't careful...resentment could creep its way in. Instead of being willing...that friend will feel used. Instead of being able to bless with acts of service...the friend who never gets asked feels distrusted and left out.

How about Jesus' trade scale. What does it look like? What did He give up in exchange for our heart? He gave up Heaven for a period of time. He gave up His throne for a season. He gave up His life on a cross. He gave up His body as one final sacrifice for a world of sinners. He gave up comfy, cozy, perfection...for rejection, betrayal, and crucifixion. 

I would say that Jesus' trade scale was severely tipped one way wouldn't you? He appeared to get the raw end of THAT deal. But why? Why didn't He feel used? Why didn't He call off the deal when He was betrayed by one of His own? Why did He continue when even His own earthly family thought He was crazy? Love without condition is who. He. is. How could He ask you to strive for it...if He couldn't even live it? So He traded. 

As often as His Father asked...Jesus gave of Himself and traded. He took our sorrow, disease, and ultimately eternal death/suffering upon Himself. And He gave us back joy, no matter the circumstance. He gave us healing and health, no matter the diagnosis. And life. He gave us life with His Father for all eternity. He could've kept it (selfishly but rightfully) to Himself. He could've let us know that we didn't deserve this trade of eternal life. And we would've had absolutely no legitimate comeback. He could  leave us speechless in shame. But that is no the example we needed. That mentality comes naturally to us. Unconditional love sooooo does not.

"The Spirit of the Lord is on me because He has annoited me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion-to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of The Lord for the display of His splendor." Isaiah 61:1-3   Go ahead trade up. Trade in your sorrows and let this truly be...the year of the Lord's favor!

Lets think about a time when we've asked for a trade that God intended to be totally lopsided. He desired a blessing for that person that you held your hand out to, for a trade. You thought this person should at least try to earn what you had to offer. They take the trade...but they feel a bit ashamed to. Your heart towards them has taken away from what God desired. It was you that He was trying to teach unconditional love to...and you couldn't get past the fact that they were undeserving.

How can we dare make others earn what God freely gives? Why do we do that? It's a heart thing. Giving of yourself. Your time. Your finances. Your wisdom. It has nothing to do with the what...and everything to do with the why. Why do you give? Because you love God. Why do you withhold? Because you love yourself more than your neighbor. That's what the Bible says to do doesn't it?! (Vanesa presses oversized sarcasm button.)

"Jesus replied, 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.'" Matthew 22:37-39

What does self love look like? Do you love your neighbor, those around you, the same way as you do yourself? Or do they have to earn the grace that you, yourself don't even deserve? Do they have to prove themselves trustworthy before you will love? Do they have to trade...always a trade...never just a blessing. Does your list of requirements always have to be met?

"27 “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you. 32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. 35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful." Luke 6:27-36

Let's trade up today. Let's not give others what they deserve...but instead what God would give. Grace. Grace comes in many forms. Let's trade our binoculars of inspection around. Let's examine ourselves first with those binoculars. Let's get rid of any unrighteousness that is within ourselves before we go throwing our flaming arrows of accusation. Let's trade our sorrows for joy. Let's trade our defeat for victory. Let's trade our celery for chocolate. ;-)

Let's look for ways to share our blessings with others. It may be making a meal for a grieving mother...and sharing in her sorrow. It may be helping a friend realize who they are in Christ with many countless texts, Facebook messages and live conversations. Can you do whatever it takes? Let's do what.ever.it.takes to help others trade up. Help them to see that giving God the weight they carry...is not giving up. It is not giving in. It is deciding to WIN!

Retreat or Defeat (Day SIXTEEN-30 Day Challenge)

If you are a reader, hearer and follower of the Word of God...I can guarantee that you've read the passage of scripture that I'm starting with today. I do have a specific point though...so stay with me. Don't skip and don't skim over them. (Confession #862,379...I do that which I just asked you not to. Sometimes when I'm reading a devotional, I skip the Bible verses if I deem it too long of a passage for my alotted time. And if its just one single verse...I may skim it...but I don't really 'pay attention'. I was challenged this weekend by the idea that in each decision you make you are either walking towards God or away. Which is it? Am I going to pass over the Word of Life that has carried me through my darkest hours? Or will I willingly read with fresh perspective? Can you see...I'm there with you. I know struggle because, by my choice, some days I struggle. Let's defeat!)

The Armor of God

" Finally, be strong in The Lord and in His mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything,      to stand. 

Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish ALL the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God." Ephesians 5:10-17

I almost missed it. Oh how close I came. If I had had Internet in my home this morning...I would.have.missed.it! I literally just got done telling you to NOT skim and skip over those exact verses and I kind of thought about doing it myself. Oh the enemy is sly but he is not smart. You see, if I had had the Internet I would have gone onto the bible gateway app and copied and pasted those verses so I didn't have to type them from my iPad screen. And if I had done that I would have missed it because I wouldn't have read it. I've read it before. I can quote it. But God was asking me to read it again. He had a fresh revelation that needed a heart willing to have fresh perspective. 

See...I have admitted before and I will say it again...I am not above you. I am preparing myself in the trenches of battle...with you. I'm fumbling to remember or take the time to pick up my armor some days. I leave it laying untouched on my nightstand. I promise to do it later...and I run out the door. Un-armed. Exposed. 

Let's try to picture now what the enemy just saw. 

"She's wide open today boys. Our plan to have her fall back asleep after she knew she was supposed to wake up and read her bible...it worked like a charm. The enemy smiles at his accomplishment. She is missing a chunk of her sword today. I bet HE was going to prepare her for this battle coming. Lets not waste our time boys. Our attack must come quick. We want to catch her off guard. We want to start her day day off stumbling...in hopes that she will soon fall. You, satan points to the ugliest and most skilled of his warriors. You have been working like a charm since the garden. Shame...it is you that will start her day. I want shame to be what she feels first, before compassion or love. I want the guilt of her 'choice' to sleep today to be a constant weight that clouds her vision. We need to knock that shield of faith out of her hand while she is unaware. I want these arrows to pierce her deep. his voice begins to quiver. I have seen what she is capable of. We do not want her to pull that Sword on us. We are no match for that. Those Words of Truth cover every lie we have. Pursue her, Shame. Remind her of what she did today. Make sure you take Disappointment with you. I have to go look for Depression. He always follows you. GO! And do not relent!"

That was really hard for me to write. I picture that conversation happening because of a few extra minutes of sleep that I sometimes choose over my morning devotion time. When you allow your heart to see it as a spiritual battle that is unseen by your eyes...but surely felt...it is easier to fight. Put yourself in that scenario above when you go to roll over in bed. Wake up and meet with God because He longs to give you exactly what you need for THAT day. He will help you be an overcomer rather than an open target.

Now let's look at what I could've missed. Something small that I have missed EVERY time I have read this passage before. "Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything   ,   to stand." I finally saw the comma before the last two words of that verse. I had never read it with that puncuation. I read it as a continuance to the verses that followed. But when you read it with that intended pause...you see what it really says. After you have put on the full armor of God. After you have done everything, remember 'to stand'.

God needs us standing up and ready. He needs our feet firmly placed and braced for attack so that it doesn't knock us over when it suddenly hits. He needs us to know that when we feel weak; when our faith is lacking...He has already given us the tools to know which piece of armor is missing.

And how about your back? Which one of those pieces of armor covers your back? NONE! (Thank you for that blaring reminder Holly Wagner!) You are not armed for retreat. When you marriage is hard...you were not meant to walk away. When God's people throw out false accusations against you...you are not equipped to run. It is the front of you that is protected by God. It is the front that braces against the winds of the storm. It is the front that walks into the difficult path because they see God in it. You were created to face opposition with confidence in Jesus.

"For I will give you words and wisdom that none of your adversaries will be able to resist or contradict. You will be betrayed even by parents, brothers, relatives and friends, and they will put some of you to death. All men will hate you because of Me. But not a hair of your head will perish. By standing firm you will gain life." Luke 21:15-19

Those words are from the lips of Jesus Himself. The heading in my Bible reads, 'Signs of the End of the Age'. Don't freak out. Stop freaking out. NOthing catches God off guard. Nothing surprises Him. Stand firm and gain life my friend. Even your hair is important enough for God to protect!

Live Love Out LOUD (Day ELEVEN -30 Day Challenge

What is your role or position in the church? Seat warmer...or active member? Fly on the wall looking for crap to get your hands into...or prayer warrior? Trouble-maker? Gossiper? Councilor? Teacher?  You will notice that some of those roles listed are not ones that you would hopefully willingly take on. The reality is though...that the enemy loves church struggle. He loves Christians fighting their own. I imagine the only other things that make him happier are when those struggles keep people outside of the walls of church. When people see the anger between people who are called first to love everyone as they do themselves...and want nothing to do with it. 

I've seen it firsthand. I've known the person who said, 'If that's what Christianity is about. If that's how love treats people...I want no part of it.' And if it doesn't break your heart, and make you want to flee from how you've been contributing to the enemy's scheme; lay on your face and pray. You are walking a road that you don't want to go down. It only leads to destruction in your life and doubt in the people watching it.

"No weapon forged against you will prevail, and you will refute every tongue that accuses you. this is the heritage of the servants of the Lord."  Isaiah 54:17  Let's write that verse again with expanded definitions in a couple of the words. I will italicize the definitions that I want to stand out to you. 

No weapon made or formed with concentrated effort against you will triumph, and you will prove to be false/erroneous every tongue that charges wrongdoing against you.

I don't want there to be any question on what that verse says. I want you to know that these weapons intentionally created to harm you...will not win. I want you to know that those who throw accusations out against you...will be proven wrong. It doesn't say they will give up accusing. It says you will be able to prove their accusations are false, fake, untrue. And if they choose to keep speaking them...they will only be destroying their own credibility. Pray for them, because they are being deceived. And sometimes...they like that deception. And that is even scarier yet. 

What if this isn't happening? What if these people accusing you seem to be winning? You are the difference. You can allow the weapons to be effective...or can you allow God to be God. He is always the victor. He is always the One to go to for truth. He has given us the Holy Spirit for times such as this. We can pray and the Holy Spirit will intercede for us.

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance to God's will." Romans 8:26-27

Let today be a new day.

 A fresh start. Go to the people you are accusing and ask for forgiveness. Go to the people you are gossiping to and let them know your words have been proven to be false. THOSE will be actions worthy of the cross. Those will speak truth over lies. Those are more honest and real than the things you were trying to fabricate. Be worthy of your calling.

"The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we heirs--heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in His sufferings in order that we might also share in His glory." Romans 8:16-17

Do you live, do you love...like you are the co-heir of Christ? Christ's inheritance. His eternal blessings are yours to take part in. You get a portion of what only He should deserve. Do you love like you are royalty? Sons and daughters of the King are not high and mighty...but they know the King of kings. Not only do they/we know Him. We are related to Him! We are proud to be His child. We have abundant provision. We have eternal promise. We have faithful help in our darkest hours.

"As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:10-11

What have been the purpose of your words lately? No one is condemning you for falling into the scheme of the enemy. We've all been there. We've all failed. The impressive thing is when we realize it AND FLEE FROM IT! What are trying to accomplish with your words? Are they helping others to bud and flourish? If not, change your purpose in speaking. Be intentional...because the enemy is. He works with intent to destroy and kill. He hates buds that he knows will soon bloom. He wants to dry up the Living Water that flows from our words of life. But he forgets...the Son always wins! 

Pillar Up (Day TEN-30 Day Challenge)

Today is already off to a rough start. I turned on my computer this morning and... It. Was. Dead. I tried everything I could think of. Now I've resorted to typing on my iPad. Not my favorite way to type...but I'm being MORE stubborn than the enemy is stupid. he forgets who he is messing with. I. Am. A. Daughter. Of. The. Most. High. God!

I planned to write about working today. But since my thoughts and research on that post are already started on my computer...I'm completely changing my focus...and trusting that God will restore it! It was His call for me to write...and it is for His glory. I'm being stretched today. And I'd surely appreciate your prayers. :-)

Today I've decided to write about pillars. What is really amazing is that if I HAD written what I planned...and if I HAD finished my post before I left to take me kids to school...I would've missed in the blessing I will mention below. This post is for Titus

today. And what the enemy tried to use to frustrate me...only made God's goodness even more noticeable! 

Pillars. You've seen them on fancy shmancy houses. You've seen them on government buildings. You've seen them in ancient architecture. What is their purpose? What can we learn from them?

Pillars are strong. They are made from materials that are meant to stay strong over many years of time. What I feel is significant about the purpose of pillars...is that they are created for something bigger. They are made strong so that they can hold up something larger than them. They are spaced in a way that makes them effective in their purpose. If one, just one, crumbles...the safety of the rest is in danger. The whole structure could collapse.

"James, Peter and John, those reputed to be pillars, gave me and Barnabas the right hand of fellowship when they recognized the grace given to me." Galatians 2:9 (The definition of the word 'reputed' is- said, considered, believed, regarded. I, myself wasn't sure...so I thought I'd just make it clear. Read the verse again with one of these words in place if it will help!)

What does it mean for Christians, for you and I to be pillars? It means we let God mold us out of His strength. We make ourselves strong in His truth and foundational wisdom. We allow God to scrape off anything that will compromise His purpose for us. Our shape is specific. Our construction is for a greater purpose than what we know. 

Pillars are not at all weak, BUT their purpose is to help something LARGER stand strong! Just as God called James, Peter and John to be pillars for Paul and Barnabas as it says in the verse above...He is calling us as well.

You should know by know that I almost always have an example that explains/shows the point I am trying to get across. Today is no different. :-) If you have been reading these daily posts in my 30 day devotional challenge...you might remember the other day when I talked about my son, Titus. He is four years old and has been afraid and unwilling to pray. (This does NOT go over well with his prayer warrior mama. Lol.) 

You may also remember that I asked you to pray for him specifically in that area. At the point in which you took on that request...YOU became a pillar for my son. Today as we drove to school I asked who would like to pray first. He yelled..."I would!" My jaw dropped and I told him to go ahead. He exuberantly prayed, on his own, without help from anyone. Heaven and this Mama rejoiced today! The enemy tried. The enemy failed. And your faith and prayers were a link to the new strength he has found. So....THANK YOU! I can't express how blessed I am to have people willing to war with me. And even more so...to have people that will war knowing they might never meet him. That is a pillar of love!

"But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

I found this verse to be ABSOLUTELY true this past summer. I agreed...pretty much because I am awful at saying no...to be the director of my church's vacation bible school. I was given a budget...that's it. No past rules or traditions. Just...Go ahead. Do it your way. It was great...and intimidating. I am NOT much of a leader. For real. I do not make decisions quickly. I don't like to be the one on which the weight of responsibility falls. I don't like to HAVE to have an answer for every question. And I didn't. Lol. But also...*whispers* I'm a procrastinator. 

So in this first year of me even being at this church for VBS...my weaknesses showed. But. God. 

My weaknesses may have made my life more stressful...but God. God showed up. He was with us every night. He worked out all of the details. He brought kids into His eternity. He brought adults that have leadership roles at our church...into a role of serventhood for these kids. They sacrificed at least a week of summer nights. They danced...and we've got proof via video! They sang loud. They high dived often. They sweated MUCH! 

So how? How did I show God to these kids in an over-the-top way? Pillars. I had people praying. People willing to war for the salvation  of these children. There were two specific prayer warriors that did just that. They prayed for each name we gave them. Every child that went through that week...was bathed in prayer. And I had women who were my own personal pillars. They didn't need me. They held me up. They encouraged me to keep going. They lifted my head and my arms if they started to droop.

Who are your pillars? Who are the people that God has placed in your path to hold you up when you want to give up? Have you thanked them? Have you even recognized them? Be intentional. Tell them how blessed you are by them. Or better yet...write it to them. That way they can read it on a day that they need a little boost!

And who is God calling you to be a pillar for? I GUARANTEE one of them is the pastor of your church. He does NOT need people from within pushing on the pillars in place. He does not need the ones in his flock to be stomping on the God-inspired vision he is carrying out. He needs every single person with breath...to commit to being or actively becoming a pillar for him. You trust him...or you would've left by now. So show him your love. What he holds is bigger than he. God's ways are more amazing than we give Him credit for. 

Who else are you holding up? Or maybe a better question...who else are you trying to destroy? Change your focus. God's vision will not die...but it can move on to someone else who is willing and passionate. And then where will the lost be? 

STAND STRONG!