Have I lost you all?

Hey there blogger world. I really and sincerely hope that I haven't lost you all because of my lack of posting. I have been unable to get on the internet at my house in weeks! I can access facebook and email from my phone...but I am not about to type out a whole blog post from there. Too annoying. =) It is a miracle that I am on now..so I want to type this as quickly as possible so I don't loose it. And my computer is going to die soon...because of course I left it on and unplugged. Ugh!

God has been teaching my sooo much through my quiet times lately. It has been so awesome. This is why journaling is so vital to me...now I can share it with you! =) The first thing I want to share is about a shattered view of Christ. I was doing a devotional by Max Lucado a few weeks ago. It was so awesome...because
#1. He is my favorite author
#2. I was really excited to be writing and hearing from God
#3. I had done this devotional in the past...and my view is sooo different now!

Let me explain. In this devotional Max talks about seeing God through a window. When you first become saved, your view is clear. Untainted by life and all that comes with it. Then, something happens that shatters your glass. Now you can still see God, but he is distorted by your pain. It is as if you blame Him for it. (This summary is in my words...but if you want the completed version I can surely get it to you. Just ask!)

Next the devotional asked me..."What kinds of circumstances cause such pain in our lives that our perception of God is altered?" Here is where it gets good. This was my response...
"I have answered this question before. I am sure then that I said going through each miscarriage my anger and resentment towards God grew stronger. When I began to have complications with my 5th pregnancy and my son Aiden prayed for me...I was filled with doubt.
Circumstances that seem to bring no good and have no explanation...those are the ones that try to shove me into that pit of despair. To make me feel as if I have no hope. But I know better! I thank my God He always reminds me...I know better."

You see...I had had a distorted view of God in the past. I saw him through my shattered glass. Through pain-filled eyes. I knew that I blamed Him at one time. I knew that He had miraculously healed me of all that. What I had never thought of was that I didn't see Him the same as I once did. He was my Healer again. He was my Father again. He was my Restorer again. He was my Comfort again. He was my Savior again. He was my Compassion again. He was my Mercy again. My view was restored...my view was strengthened. I now see Him through a much more powerful set of eyes. Christ's! I am a daughter of the Most High.

Want to know how to fix a pain-distorted view of God? Tune in tomorrow. ;)

Love ya all!